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- 2️⃣140: Some Internet Tips 🛜
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When was the last time you didn’t feel overwhelmed by the state of the world?
If you tend to spend a lot of time online trying to “stay informed” on everything that’s happening, you probably can’t remember the last time you felt completely relaxed. It’s like every day there’s a new horror that you know is a horror and shouldn’t happen, but you also question it because there are so many people who just act like nothing is happening — like this is all perfectly normal.
It’s exhausting.
It’s so exhausting that I feel like I’ve typed this exact paragraph before because everyone knows this is nothing new.
I’m not here to give you answers on how to fight these feelings. It’s not easy, and it’s different for everyone. The only thing I could say that applies to every single person in the world regardless is to touch some grass. Disconnect, go outside, stand in the sun, and talk to people off the internet. Deep down, I feel that’s the only true way to combat this despair and isolation we feel from being “more connected than ever before.”
But, even after you do that, you’ll have to log back in eventually. When you do, you want to be prepared. Here are a few things I’ve learned from the countless hours spent online that might help you have the most fulfilling, or least dread-inducing, experience possible.
Wait 3-5 days before reacting to that thing that happened that everyone is going crazy about
Another bombing, another murder, another natural disaster that claimed the lives of hundreds who could’ve been saved if we did things differently, another global corporation going under causing financial turmoil and thousands of job losses — another senseless act of violence, and so on and so forth. These things keep happening, and they never seem to slow down. You feel powerless to stop any of them, but at least you can shout it from the rooftops and let people know what’s right and what’s wrong, right?
Yes, but no.
When something happens, let it breathe. I promise your life will not be any different if you wait five days to share a post on your story about the latest current event. Nobody is counting solely on you to be the one to share the horrific story that occurred, or else they would never hear about it.
This isn’t just about giving yourself a break. It’s about sharing factual information. Things move so quickly nowadays that we get instant reactions from people blaming one thing or another. We’re emotionally triggered to share something that feels meaningful without verifying whether that thing is true or not or whether we even have enough information to be speaking on it.
There is so much content on the internet that a photo shared today could be years old, and you would never know about it. There are countless bad actors out there with horrible intentions or just regular individuals who share things in bad faith for a laugh. Spend any time on the internet, and you are bound to come across information that is straight-up lies. But because we are so keen on getting our opinion out there, we don’t even stop to verify whether it’s worth doing. We just worry about whether it fits the narrative we have in our minds of why this is happening.
If you take a breath, gather information, verify your sources, and let a situation play out, you’re putting yourself in the right position to be speaking on these events. You’re also doing a favor to all the people who will see your stories and read your posts. Furthermore, everything you share shapes your reputation one way or another. Don’t ever forget that. Once you put it out there, it’s out of your hands. You’re letting people use that info to judge who they think you are. And you have no control.
Oh, and I wasn’t even considering Ai when I wrote any of this….
Don’t get upset at things made for the general public when you’re a niche consumer
The Bear is a very popular FX (Hulu) show about one of the world’s top chefs moving home to run a sandwich shop after a family tragedy. It’s one of my favorite shows ever. I love it and highly recommend you watch it.
The show focuses on people working at a restaurant, so we spend a lot of time learning about what happens in the kitchen. Which means there are a ton of people who have worked at restaurants/kitchens throughout their lives complaining about what they got right and what they got wrong. They are obsessed with critiquing all the “incorrect” things that happen in the kitchen, and they say that ruins the show for them.
The thing is, the show wasn’t made to give you an in-depth look at how a kitchen runs. If you’re watching for that reason, you’re not going to enjoy what you’re seeing. There are plenty of other shows that focus on just that. Don’t get upset at something you see online because it’s not enough about the thing you want it to be. Just enjoy it for what it is. You’ll be happier in the long run — trust me.
The best thing you could do? Don’t share it at all. This ties back to our first tip: you don’t have to say something about everything. Sometimes, you feel very passionate in the moment about something and think it’s crucial you share your opinion. But an opinion formed in the heat of the moment could backfire on you.
The best things I’ve ever shared online are actually the things I didn’t share. When you’re excited, you think of all the right reasons and forget all the ways things could go wrong. We’re all one wrong thing shared online from completely fucking up our lives.
It’s better to stay quiet, gather all the proper information, and then keep living your life knowing what’s what and making decisions from that source of knowledge.
If you see someone posting in a style similar to yours, don’t go on a rant for everyone to see. It doesn’t look good. Just be flattered. That’s showbiz, baby!
There are billions of other people on the planet. Chances are someone, somewhere, came up with the same idea as you. It doesn’t mean they stole it from you — it just happens. Things move faster than ever these days. If you have a great idea, put it out there. Every second you delay, you’re giving someone else time to reach the same conclusion and share it before you do.
And even if you see someone else share something that is the same thing you’ve been working on, share it anyway! I can’t tell you how many random books or stories I’ve discovered recently that are strikingly similar to the zombie story I’ve been writing in my head for years. I didn’t know these other stories existed, yet these random authors and I were thinking of the same things. It happens. The good stuff will always come out on top, and the only way you’re guaranteed to fail is if you never try.
Speaking of rants… The people watching those long videos of you talking or reading your essay posts probably aren’t the ones you want to reach. Find a way to simplify your message to reach a wider audience. You’ll be way more effective
If you disagree with someone politically and you want to change their minds, going on a long rant about how they’re idiots and are wrong and listing all the reasons why isn’t going to help you accomplish your goal. The people whose minds you want to change are not watching your video. If they are, you’re probably working against your cause.
I don’t have any advice on what will actually work; I’m just certain that this tactic won’t. Spend your energy in better places and find better ways to share your message.
The celebrity you’re shit-talking about their personal struggles won’t see your posts. But your friends who go through the same things will. Think about it
Empathy. It’s something that is severely lacking nowadays. Whenever I write an email, I think about all the potential people in my life who might read it. Sometimes I’m thinking about some very specific people when I write certain things. Then I stop and think about how they would feel if they read what I just wrote.
Would they realize I’m talking about them?
If they do, how would they feel?
Would anything I say change their mind?
Would it make them feel worse?
Is there a way I can get my point across without being so specific and providing a more general idea that anyone could potentially relate to?
Can I be effective writing these ideas while simultaneously not alienating people I might disagree with but care deeply about?
All very important things to ask yourself before sharing things online because at the end of the day you still have to wake up and share the world with those people tomorrow.
Not everything is “cancel culture.” Sometimes you say some insensitive, ignorant, racist, sexist, xenophobic, homophobic, transphobic, and fucked-up things. Don’t be upset when you get called out for it.
This one is pretty self-explanatory. Don’t be shitty.
Saying some fucked-up things does not entirely define who a person is and everything they’ve done in their lives. We need to allow space for people to make mistakes. If we don’t, we’ll never change anything.
I’m not excusing saying or doing fucked-up things. I’m saying that we can’t expect people to be infallible. We can’t expect them to reach the “right” conclusion from the beginning and be perfect all the way through.
Younger generations are growing up in a world that no one before them ever experienced. Their entire lives are connected to the internet, including everything they say or do. We have yet to properly adapt or understand how much this affects them. Just because you look up to someone and then they do something you don’t like doesn’t invalidate every good thing they did before.
There are layers, nuance, and gray areas everywhere. Always remember that.
PS
Y’all have been doing a great job of clicking the ads lately. I appreciate it so much. There’s another one below this paragraph. Please click it again so I can keep paying for this platform and keep sending emails.
There’s also a great tweet after the ad — scroll all the way down to enjoy it.
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thanks obama
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