2️⃣073: the art of the playlist 🎧

Thank you.

Thank you so much for putting your ego aside and paying attention to the artist's intentions and direction for experiencing something they spent time and energy carefully crafting (said sarcastically but with lots of love, still).

I love putting together playlists. It's an art, a talent, a certain je ne sais quoi that not many people seem to have. Since I'm lucky enough to have it, and you're smart enough to have signed up for this email, I'd love to continue sharing my talents with you today (final email sent from South Beach).

This playlist has been in the works for a while, and I've been tinkering. Trying to get it to feel like something everyone on Earth covets: A Good Day. 

Not an incredible day. Not a day when you won the lottery, got engaged, or got that promotion you worked so hard for. Those are all awesome days. Days we spend years looking forward to, preparing for, and dreaming about. Days that remain in our memories forever, even when other moments start to fade.

That's not the type of day I'm talking about.

I'm talking about a regular ass day. A day that isn't remarkable, but nothing bad happens either. 

In this case, let's call this particular day, a Tuesday 🤠

You don't have any work this Tuesday. Not because it's a holiday or you took a day off, you just don't have any work this Tuesday. And you don't have any work that Wednesday either. Two days off!

So, you don't have any work this 2uesday. And you don't have to work on Wednesday either. And you don't have to run any errands, take care of anything, or worry about absolutely anything at all except whatever brings you joy that day (has a day like that ever existed? asking for a friend).

You woke up 2UESDAY morning (without an alarm). Went for a nice workout (you're feeling amazing after). You mosied around the house making breakfast and catching up on emails from your favorite writer (not a blog). You actually liked the last email so much you shared it with a friend who isn't subscribed and convinced them to subscribe (what a great idea now that I type it out, you should try it).

You look up from your small screen (because you've been captivated by the emails) and notice it's about to be noon. Your friends are coming to pick you up!

Time to get ready for the beach. Let's throw on a playlist and get this day going.

A classic. What a beautiful feeling. No one could make you love the early mornings like Mark McGrath singing about finding used condoms on his girlfriend's bed and wondering if he could use or re-use them himself (possibly more than once).

Polyamorous King vibes for Mr. McGrath? Definitely

Safe sex? Not so much. Sir, please don't re-use those. Get a new one.

But you're not thinking about all that. You're getting ready for the beach.

Towel? ✅

Chair? ✅

Hat? ✅

Sunscreen? ✅

Football? ✅

Speakers? ✅

Cooler? ✅

Ice & drinks? We still need those (no check).

*car horn honks*

Your friends are outside. Time to get this show on the road. Just remember to tell them to stop to pick up some drinks and ice.

You walk out, hop in the car, and...

Turn that shit up! Now it's feeling like a beach day! Oh, before we head out. We need to make sure to stop to pick up some ice and seltzers.

You're drinking seltzer???

Fuck yeah, dude.

That's weak.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah!

Ok, how about you drink nothing but the seltzer I picked today and then tell me how weak it is. I'll buy the rack.

Deal.

We gotta stop at Publix to get them and also ice. And we should order pub subs too! Order online and pick them up while we're there. Boom, no need to worry about lunch at the beach.

Damn, bro, you're smart. Is that what they taught you at that fancy university you paid so much money for?

Actually, they taught me how to puke on command and make crazy playlists like the one you're listening to right now. Don't read into that too much. Let's go 🚗💨

Pub sub was a great idea.

It always is.

Fine, seltzer. So we're getting the High Noon?

Ew, those are gross. I go with Topo Chico, AriZona Sunrise, or the Funky Buddha if we want to keep it local.

AriZona like the tea?

Yeah, but they don't have the version I like. So let's go with the Topo Chico and Funky Buddha. You know they're going to sponsor me one day.

Sponsor you for doing what?

Being dope as shit 😎

Can't believe we found parking that fast.

It's a Tuesday....

True.

Don't any of you have jobs?

What's that supposed to mean?

Focus! We need to find where we're going to sit.

Picking the right place to sit at the beach (or any other social congregation) is also an art. It can set the mood for the rest of your time there. It can turn a good day into a great day. And a great day into a horrible one. Wherever you decide to sit, choose wisely.

(EDITOR'S NOTE: The author of this email is terrible at picking where to sit.)

We found the perfect spot. Great views. Great sand. Put some music on that makes me feel like anything is possible but also keeps me level-headed acknowledging the trials and tribulations of the world.

Yo, this spot is fucking perfect. How good is this spot?

It's a great spot.

I'm starting to feel these seltzers.

What happened to seltzers being weak?

I'll try anything if I'm not paying for it. And I'm starting to feel these creep up on me.

That's what happens when you drink two in 30 minutes. You need to chill. These are going to sneak up on you like Will Smith on Chris Rock at the Oscars.

Will Smith did not sneak up on Chris Rock. He saw him coming from a mile away. He made eye contact as he was coming. He even got a joke off while Will was walking over!

Exactly, all that time to make a decision, and he still stood there and got slapped like a punk.

Never thought about it that way.

Another Claw!

We're not drinking White Claws.

Another of whatever!

It's going to be one of those days for him, isn't it?

Maybe we get lucky, and he passes out for a few hours.

Yo, is he asleep already?

Shhh.....just let him be. Let's enjoy this peace and quiet before the dragon awakens.

Is it me, or have the past 4 groups of women that walk by all been checking us out?

That's what happens when you play Bad Bunny. Especially a deeper cut from the B Side of the album. 

He's awake!

And I'm feeling like uuuuuuuwwiiiiiiiiiii (ENG: ooooooooweeeeeeeeeee)

I have no idea what this lady is saying, but this music is making my hips move in ways I didn't think possible.

Calm down, buddy. We don't want to end up on the six o'clock news with the headline "White Boy on South Beach Breaks Hips From Too Much Reggeaton"

That wouldn't be a bad way to go out.

He's got a point.

We're more likely to end up on OnlyInDade.

That's like the six o'clock news. 

For chongas. 

Sun is setting. Let's start packing up so we can head out before it gets dark.

One more drink!

Let's go.

This is my song!

You've never heard this song before.

But I have now, and I love it. Come ooonnn. Let's stay and watch the sunset.

Why don't we leave, walk all the way to the car, and then enjoy the sunset while crossing the bridge and get a better view.

I always knew you were a smart one 🧠

You were right about the sunset while crossing the bridge 🤩

Why am I always so tired after the beach?

You drank 13 cans of seltzer. I think we found the culprit. 

Also, drinking all day in the sun getting dehydrated. Everyone gets tired at the beach.

Exactly, it wasn't the seltz...🥱🫠😴

Let's keep the music low until we get home so he doesn't wake up. 

After party!

He's up...

Order pizza!

That's actually a great idea. 

I put the order in. Got a few because I invited some people over. 

You what?

Come on, you like them. And she likes youuuuu

If we're going to have people over I need to clean up. 

Your place looks fine. 

No, it's a mess. You wouldn't know because you live in a mess. Just let me pick up a few things. Can you change this song? I need to think and it's not letting me. 

You added a song in a playlist with an entire email explaining why every song belongs just so you could write about a scene where you ask to skip the song because it doesn't fit in the story?

It fits perfectly in the story. I wrote it and sent it out. It's an important turning point for the plot. 

Hookah?

I'm not going to hit it but go for it. 

I like the vibe you guys have here. 

Yeah, thanks for inviting us over. 

He didn't want to invite anyone. 

Not true. All I said was we needed to clean up a bit before. 

As you should. What, you don't clean up when someone's visiting?

Of course, I do! Speaking of songs, have you heard this one?

Okay, I see you. I didn't know you knew about this. 

Knew about what?

Just, this type of music. Something different. Not on the radio. 

She said she thinks I listen to the radio 💔

Maybe you do know a thing or two. I might be starting to like you. 

For some reason, they always underestimate me. Once we cross the threshold, they can never get enough (it's the smile 🤠). 

Maybe we should've put Closing Time here instead. Let's start wrapping this up. 

The day might be over, but anything is still possible. Even You & Me. 

So, you staying?

Think about it 🌚🌝

Have a beautiful day ☺️