1. drink lots of water

There’s nothing a curse hates more than someone who’s hydrated. That’s why this is the first reason. When you drink lots of water, you avoid cramps, you have more energy, your skin glows, and you’re about a half-inch taller than when you’re dehydrated—true story (don’t look it up). That extra H₂O gives your brain a boost and improves cognitive functions. And if all of that isn’t enough, you’ll be going to the bathroom so often a curse won’t even be able to keep up with you.

2. get lots of sun

Curses haaaaaaaate the sun. They’re like vampires in that sense. What do vampires do? Suck your blood and drain your life. Just like… curses. All it takes is five minutes of standing outside under the sun (without your phone) to drain a curse of more than half of its total energy. If you can do all that in just five minutes, imagine what hours would do?

3. touch some grass

You might think that #3 and #2 are the same thing—they’re not. Standing outside under the sun is one thing. You could do that in the middle of a highway. Touching grass, feeling the earth, and letting go of all your worries—that’s something entirely different. Curses hate it when you touch grass because you start to realize what’s important and what’s not. The Achilles heel of a curse is when the cursee starts noticing that a curse doesn’t actually matter. The only power a curse has over you is the one you give it.

4. read a book

When you read a book, you learn things, and you gain new perspectives. If you really want to piss a curse off, let them know you learned something and gained a new perspective. These two things are antithetical to the existence of a curse because a curse relies on you to be stubborn and rigid in your ways. The more opportunities you give yourself to be curious about the world instead of judgmental, the more likely you are to defeat a curse.

5. spend time with real humans, outside

This is the irl version of reading a book. A book gives you perspectives and information about things you may never get to experience. Spending time with people from your community gives you that same opportunity with others living lives just like yours. This is critical to your success against a curse because a curse expects you to believe you’re the only one who feels cursed. Once you realize there are countless people out there who have defeated curses they don’t seem that powerful anymore.

6. rainbows

Celebrate every rainbow. A rainbow can never be cursed. It’s a f*cking rainbow 🌈

7. facetime your loved ones

This is low-key one of the most powerful weapons in your arsenal against curses. Curses want to make you feel like you’re alone. But you’re never truly alone. There’s always someone out there who loves you and wants to hear from you. Give them a call, talk for a bit. I promise you’ll feel better after, and any curse will start feeling weaker by the minute.

8. have a fixed sleep schedule

When you’re tired, you can’t think straight. You get sloppy. That’s when curses get you. They’re waiting for the moment you slip to finally pounce. Because curses are cowards, they’ll never attack you at full strength. They only prey on the weak. You’re at your strongest when you get all the sleep you need. So, get some sleep, beat the curse—it’s that easy.

9. enjoy the little things

They’re all little things.